all i want are voice calls,icecream treats and you spoiling me with your loyalty

Dear Hopeless Romantic,

As much as I’d like to talk to you in person, I can’t, because I know I’d end up mum the moment you’re near. I’d like you to know how much I am missing you. I miss you much that I’m back to doing what I’m good at: Facebook stalking! I am back to my bad habit just so I could see your face and end up missing you more than yesterday.(I know you like that, not the stalking part though but the missing you part). I said, absence makes the heart grow falter, indeed it is true…It seems it’s true on your part…but for me, your absence made me fonder. I miss you much that my immune system server is down because I can’t sleep thinking and wishing about you.

As much as I’d like to see you, I cannot, because I’m afraid you’d see and make me realize how way more I’ve missed you than my much.

As much as I’d like to send you a message, I can’t, because I don’t know what to send in the first place. A simple good morning seems duh and an alibi is just so errrrrs.

As much as I’d like to call you, I won’t, because that just means I have to talk to you.

As much as I’d like to tell you some things, I will not, because I don’t want to change my mind.

And so I won’t tell you how happy I am every time we’re together.

How excited I am to see you every day, and if I’m not able to catch a glimpse of you, just the thought that you’re somewhere near is enough to make my day.

How I’d like you to be my forever.

How you make me angry and jealous and yet still like you at the same time.

How I smile when I see her happy with you, and how I cry when I see you happy with her.

These I want to tell you, along with many other petty things that make my heart thump slower and my head throb faster.

…But I won’t tell you, because I am not romantic and I’m hopeless about it. 

I don’t have any romantic bones in me; all I am is a set of protruding bones.

And you lessen the hope I had when you said that we can’t be... all because you've drawn an invisible boundary.  

With all the courage I could muster ,

Romantically Hopeless

p.s. And I won't write this on paper again...because I'm a girl and would like to feel like one.(huh? hahaha!)

achooooo!sniff*

'twas rainy and gloomy but it was all sunshiny!

...horrible feelings don't last...they too shall pass...that's what my friend told me the other day.

It's true, they did pass...and yesterday was so overwhelming.  After sending group messages and individual messages to friends if they have an installer of peachtree accounting software or where can I get one for free and not getting much helpful feedbacks and some no feedback at all, I have to activate again my Facebook account and contact people from there. It seemed that people are easier to find and receive immediate feedback in FB than making calls or texting them. Good thing a classmate of mine whom I've encountered recently at SEC has a peachtree installer and kindly gave me the file. (kindly because he waited for me past the working hours)

I did built my courage to ask for help from someone I'm not so close with (we're classmates in college and in the same group for a school project once,but that was it)...and I have to muster all energy and bravery or whatever to go there alone ( I asked a friend of mine to accompany me ..but you know what happened coz I ended up going there alone). whew! I am just thankful that there are people who are helpful and wouldn't mind allotting a speck of their time in extending help.

When I got home, my highschool friends are there. It's been a long time since I had the quality time of chitchatting and having a carefree but meaningful conversations. I realized I've missed them more than how much I thought I missed them. We had an impromptu dinner (at home) and another friend arrived. It's great having your different generation friends together. It shows how far you've come so far...as time goes,we don't really leave friends behind,we just widened our circle of loved ones as we grow older in life. 

When you're with great friends, you can just talk about almost everything and ask anything. One sure sign you're with a good bunch of friends is when you can all be crazy and still make sense out of it (know what I mean?haha!) . 

And just when I thought the day was over and declared that yesterday ended happily,life had one last surprise for me. An old friend too,whom I haven't heard from so long texted me. Since my phonebook isn't updated,I had to ask who the person texting is...and he had the humor to introduce himself again.

"This is ( insert name here), (insert age here),(address), your classmate and the one who had a crush on you in elementary and highschool. Do you know me now?"

And I was smiling widely because it feels good to know that I was never forgotten. I am still remembered from time to time. And for that, I am ever grateful and thankful that I was given the chance to know such loving people. I feel guilty too that I've been taking their presence for granted. I pray that I may have a loving heart. One that can keep them the way they've kept me.  

P.S. I've already sorted out the Microsoft excel thing...but not the missing someone thingy (but at least I can now move on to another concern---which is the Statement of Cash flows and the upcoming monthend reports)

Just In: My friend's wife (our visitors last night) is on labor right now, One baby boy comin' up! and I am now expecting and excited for an ice cream treat! 

There will always be room for ice cream..and of new people and friends :D

Yes! Magazine April 2014

Yes! (insert jumping mini me here)

Yes! (insert crazy waving of arms)

Yes! (insert wide toothed smile here)

I cannot contain my poker face  when Enrique Gil  will be on the cover of Yes! Magazine April 2014 issue. The magazine issue for the month will be featuring an inside look on Gil’s house as well as that of Heart Evangelista's. A bonus would be Iya and Drew’s wedding and Lot Lot de Leon meeting her  Papa Don .

I just know that this issue's content will be flowing over the pages.

I’m definitely buying.! 

Ayt!

whirlwind...

Few more days and it's 2014. It seemed like yesterday when we (my BBFF and I) were sort of worried and defensive about our horrorscopes for 2013 when it said that this year will be a year of challenge and change...that spelled A HARD YEAR. . .and instead of resisting life,we managed to go with the flow which I believe took us to some better place.

Who could've thought that I'd be doing this blogging thingy? Pursuing an accountancy course, plunging into the unknown,got hurt and took another chance in love and embracing all the feelings it brought? This year was more than a roller coaster ride, It's more of a whirlwind. No seat belts and safety precautions...just chaos all around but I found peace at the same time being aware that at last I can see that my life is in motion. I've found new friends and seemed to lose some.But one thing that this year etched on my mind is that life goes on,and just because we are upset doesn't mean that time will stop for us. We shouldn't dwell in the past,we should move on but never forget what it taught us. Accept that some people may be heroes for others but to us they're just plain jerks (and also we could be that jerk). Tell your story,someone might be listenin' and you'll never know what lessons/inspiration they might be getting from it. I've been listening and listening and never sharing those to others. This year,I talked more..some may be none sense but I talked more than the usual,and I like the feeling of having an itchy dry throat from too much talking.

I am very thankful for the people who came my way. They made me realize that no matter how alone you feel,someone cares. (you just have to let them show it to you). I am also grateful for the people who stayed,despite my lack of sweet caring bones. (well I have sweet caring thoughts with no actions).Thank you for sticking in with the stubborn me. I'd like also to say sorry for the people I offended because of my careless tongue and harsh thoughts. (I am sorry but I don't regret saying whatever those words were). Sometimes I think that the reason why I'm quiet almost of the time is to avoid offending others. :D

I am just very blessed that I got this far, little by little (in my own pace) I'm growing up.

I pray that 2014 will be another good year,with lesser tragedies and calamities and more of innovations and peace linkages. I pray for comfort and guidance as we continue in living good lives for the greater glory of our Lord.

Gambatte as always! Strive to survive!

...and as another year is starting,I want to share a major life changing trigger I had for this year 2013(my life never really started spinning until this): 

"She was staring at the sky
 She is hiding from the light
And I wonder what she’s thinking
Then she made me realize
That life is like a roller coaster ride
 Now you smile
 And then you cry
Then you do it over
 Over and over
Fly like the airplane in the sky
Set it free let it go
 Feel the hurt just let it fall"

(credits to the writer)

... just let go and fall,someone will catch you or you'll learn how to fly on your way down.

Going SOL...?

"…but i think it's very healthy to spend time alone. you need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person."

                                          -olivia wilde.

I’s good to spend time alone…why don't you try to go solo some other time?

How to go sol:

Be determined to go alone. A personal date with yourself is a treat your inner self deserves . (remember being alone doesn’t mean you’re lonely. The fact that you can enjoy hanging out with yourself is one thing you can be proud of)

Be prepared (charged cellphone,moolah,umbrella and a jacket). The charged cellphone will be for emergency purposes,use it only when in desperate need of help. Do not go sol,and spend the whole time texting your friends how you wished they’re with you or replying to their messages on how they wish they are with you. I say, keep your phone alert for calls and turn off your message alert tone. When going sol,you can do without the cellphone but not the last three)

Dedicate the whole day for you (you may run some few errands but make sure that a bigger portion of the day will be a ME-TIME

Do not stay at home! (that doesn’t count as going sol)

The best place to go sol is at a mall. Stroll around, watch a movie, dine, visit clothe shops, pet shops,gadget stores,book shops, and in my case, I sometimes visit hardwares.

You can go to church,stroll on streets and hang out in a park or café.

It is hard to go sol on a vacay trip..vacay trips are better with friends or the fam. That way, you get to split the bill and when you’re lost,at least you’re not alone or that someone would be looking for you ;D

 

Going sol doesn’t really mean spending lavishly on one’s self. It is more of taking time to tune in with yourself, testing if you’re still able to make your own judgment when given two choices, knowing your first reactions to situations, and understanding yourself more by the things that make you happy and piss you off . It also allows you to look around and observe, to give smiles to strangers and answer some questions or the other way ‘round. If you’re not friends with yourself, then going sol gives you a chance to befriend you.

Having friends is great but being friends with your self is way more than great. Sometimes, friends influence a person too much that that the other is in danger of becoming a clone. (well in this case, they’re not friends, but just peers). Going solo is also good when you’re so low…you don’t just get to scold and console yourself but you get to ask and force yourself to answer truthfully.

Last November 27,2013, I went Sol for Disney’s Frozen 3D movie. ‘twas uber cool to think that I almost watched the movie alone in the theatre if the guard and a father with kids didn’t came in later

Why I go sol:

I go sol because of selfish reasons, when going    sol,I don’t have to worry whether the person I’m with is bored, tired or hungry. . . 

Why I’ll go sol : 

I’ll go sol because I’m more comf’table when I’m with myself than when I’m with someone.

Why I’d not go sol :

they say, life starts at the end of our comfort zones…and I’d like to sail somewhere ala life of Pi with some monkeys, snakes and perhaps a tiger. (kidding!)

Why I’ll try not to go sol all the time: 

to challenge myself outside my comfort zone is to give myself a chance to level up! So I’m on the loose…but still tied of course. (You don’t know what I mean :D )..Plus life they say is not just about knowing yourself but more of knowing others and letting them know you.

My BBFF who is taking up law gave me this shirt.A good reminder that there will always be people who will care. ;)

esse est co-esse (to exist is to co-exist)

Chasing a Dream:Choosing Happiness:Chance Offered...grab all

Please welcome me back...

I just got back my wifi modem after downgrading my unlimited plan 899 to limited 450. Holidays and holydays are approaching and I'd be spending most of these times on a place where I cannot get the most of the unlimited wifi connection,so went the downgrade to save more Php (for gifts?) :D

I'm sort of chasing a dream (not the kind you get by sleeping but the kind where you stay up and study), and that requires passing all exams(which will be next week)...and my plan was to go home earlier,eat earlier so I can study earlier but Centrio Garden is at buzz for this is where Mercato de Oro is situated so maybe I can stall awhile and just wake earlier tomorrow so that I can study earlier. 

There are food stalls (from full meals to snacks to cakes and cupcakes). There are also trinkets for sale,tables where you can eat comfortably and live music. My plan was to just sort of scan the area just to know what it has to offer and come back later with some moolah and friends. It's useless when you talk yourself into not spending and you end up giving in to spending. Though I have to admit, it's a good find and will be useful too.

the bag that gives a chance to help...

Just what I needed: A bigger bag to accommodate more books and a constant reminder why I'm in this hullabaloo kind of life. (just kidding on the hullabaloo part)

PagBAG-o Project (Change Project) is a creative livelihood collaboration between housewives in Xavier Ecoville who produce the bags and Xavier University students & alumni who make the designs.

Xavier Ecoville is a resettlement community for Topical Storm Sendong survivors located in Brgy. Lumbia, Cagayan de Oro City. Supporting their pagBAG-o project by purchasing these bags will keep the livelihood alive thus will continue to support families in the community. This project is also currently supporting typhoon Yolanda survivors in Visayas.

Go buy one for yourself and more for your friends and family. :D

They have a spot on Mercato de Oro's bazaar ;you may also contact them at pagbagoproject@gmail.com or find them on facebook pagbag-o project or thru 0935-370-9448

I know I mentioned about food....and this Mexican Cantina menu is all I  can manage to show you (for now).

MASAS Mexican Cantina mobile: 0917-314-4612

Espero que mi próximo blog será sobre la comida.muchas gracias, hasta la próxima vez.

landscaped...errrr...hairscaped I mean :D (My hairscape experience)

I cannot erase the thought of having a haircut might turn out as horrorcut after..(to think November is just outside our doors), but I'd like to have a newer look before I go home in the mountains for the holidays.

All I wanted was to have some bangs swept on the sides (sideswept bangs it is) and tadah! I ended with a full haircur and a fuller ego*. 

'Twas my first time to try Hairscape.Ph in Centrio-Ayala Mall and I was on my usual solo flight modes (that means there's no one to tell me whether I'm off to a good place or a doom place) but I'm glad I went in anyway..

Hairscape.Ph gave me a sense of comfort (as if trying to tell me "relax,your head/hair will be in good hands":D). Their haircut service came with a relaxing shampoo massage (I could've  stayed lying there and enjoy more of the massage). I was offered drinks (tea ? water?) of my choice and it's free. What I love more was the initiative that I was given a magazine in case I wanted to browse one (That's being sensitive of what type of customer they are having and I'd like to assume that they sensed my shyness ).

Mae was my stylist,and thank heavens (at last!),someone told me that bangs might be not so for me since I have a low forehead. She recommended a bob and some treatments that my hair would be very happy to have (I guess,bob's my forever and pixie will just remain in my dreams). She definitely gave me a haircut that sent my inner self grinning widely from ear to ear evily (I told you, my ego's full).

It was also my first time to have two people (mae & marisol) working simultaneously in blowdrying my hair (the fuss did made the experience worthwhile---add three more people to work on the manis, pedis and make up, and I'd feel like I'm some make believe celebrity ).

I just didn't had a haircut, I had myself Hairscaped...and Oh,they finished it off with a spray of TIGI Bedhead product ( If I'm not mistaken that was the HeadRush).


One haircut can turn your world around.
People may see the difference but there is more to that....YOU (with the new haircut) can feel that difference.

I don't want to post pictures of myself in shiminisheng but moi/ego is full so I'm posting it anyway :D

There I go, after the overflowing of close and open parenthesis I just want to tell you that my experience was definitely worth having.

Have your own experience, Hairscape.ph is located at 3rd floor Centrio-Ayala Mall. Find them on Facebook hairscape.ph



P.S. It seems that my Sundays are becoming FIC (Fruits in Ice Cream) days...I had a scoop of Choco Mint variant.

*self

coping..when there's no prevention and cure

We cannot fully avoid stress...so when it comes...here are some of my tried and tested busters for stress. I've read a full
article of this on Yahoo (a long list of busters I say...some were not applicable to me), so here's the list of what worked for me and I added some of my own.


1.For 5 minutes each day, forget your plans and worries and live in the present, enjoying what's around you

2.Get it off your chest. Bottled-up feelings increase stress. If someone disappoints or upsets you, let them know..or let someone know.

3.Just say no. It's not being selfish-it's a great prevention against stress.

4.Take sleep seriously.

5. Nurture your friendships. Kindred souls will help you stay sane

6.Whatever you enjoy doing, give it a regular place in your life.

7.Make the morning rush less crazed by embracing an easy hair and makeup routine. (or the no make up routine)

8.Know your stress signals (e.g., tummy troubles or neck pain), so you can recognize them right away and take care of yourself

9.Give yourself credit. Under stress, we often focus on failure instead of moving forward to complete what needs to be done.

10.Give yourself a pat on the back…not to console yourself but to acknowledge that you may did not so fine but you’ll do better next time.

11.When you need a time-out, go out somewhere ( a place in the town or a place in your head) and listen to music

12.Walk whenever you can. Walk because you can.

13.Try retail therapy (only if the other busters won’t work…make it your last option if you don’t want to go broke!)..though retail therapy for me is some sort of an indication that I’m stressed…when I realized later that I just spent some money for some useless or not so necessary things…that’s when I try the other busters.

14.Ask for help. Remember that you don't have to do everything by yourself

15.   Keep a stress diary. You’ll realize patterns and you get to understand yourself more. (I call it mood mapping)

16.   Get enough sleep. When you're tired, even small problems seem so large. (Did I mention already to take sleep seriously?)

17.   Don't hurry out of the water…enjoy the shower. (this  is not applicable when you’re running late for work…on some weekends perhaps)

18.   Go for a brisk walk. Vigorous exercise burns nervous energy and pumps you full of feel-good endorphins

19.   Clean out your cabinet, purse, bag or desk drawer. This will boost your sense of control

20.   Try thinking worst-case-scenario to see how unrealistic overreacting is. If you're stuck on traffic, take the thought, "I'm going to be late," to a ludicrous point, "I'm going to be fired," to an even more ludicrous point, "I'm going to have to sell pencils on the street!" Feel your anxiety deflate.

21.   Fold laundry or do the laundry -productivity combats stress

22.   Plan a vacation. You don't really have to travel-the idea is to move your thoughts somewhere else. (though pursuing the idea of really traveling somewhere would excite you and would definitely give you good vibes) ;)

23.   Count your blessings. Focusing on what's going well in your life will give you perspective and make you feel better

24.   Search online for a short funny video to watch-laughter reduces stress hormones (Youtubing I say!)

25.   Think about the person who is stressing you out. Is she/he under pressure herself? Empathy helps defuse tension

26.   Call a friend who will listen without judgment. Not only will it help you to vent, but your friend's calmer state will rub off on you. ( a no-fail buster…works all the time. I’m very grateful to have my BBFF)

27.   If your heart is pounding, do not fight the symptom…ride it like a wave.

28.   Breathe slowly through your nose (with your mouth closed). Visualize your breath going to the center of your head, then going out. Do this 5 to 15 times

29.   Peel an orange. Breathe in the aroma as you tear away the skin. .. and enjoy eating the orange.

30.   Try scream therapy: Let out a shout in your head (I’d like to try screaming out in the field or  beach..might work out faster). You'll feel better afterward

31.   Say a prayer-it's one of the most potent antidote to stress. Connecting with a higher power helps you gain strength and clear your mind

32.   At work, walk over to someone's desk to talk, go to the watercooler, force yourself to move. It will relieve physical tension

33.    Sit up straight.

34.   Take three deep breaths-5 seconds in, 5 seconds out-to slow your heart rate and the pace of your stress hormones.

35.   Sit up straight.

36.   Read a new book or try a new ice cream flavor.

37.   Look around…you’ll realize you’re not just the one who’s on breaking point…and if you see happy people, then It’s an assurance that even if we’re having troubles right now, these too shall pass and better days are definitely coming.

.

...stress is one big pimple grower...we can't handle another stress due to pimple breakouts..(right?).p

Welcome to the chambers of my heart.

---no edits...I normally write my thoughts on paper...but I found out these thoughts were in soft copy (might as well post it...to give you a glimpse of some untold stories) :) ...they serve as mood map...reminding me of the thoughts i had which led me to the present thoughts i'm havin' (huh?)..I happen to have thought these in the past three months. They say, when you can talk about something freely and publicly,that means you've already accepted the fact and already moved on. ('s that true?)..

July 4,2013

This was one of days wherein the day started not so right but definitely ended with a surprise. I woke up late today and my morning routine was delayed. At work,my new PC wasn’t set upped yet and so I have a new bunch of files on my pending task collection. To make it more worst, yahoo mail won’t accept my password and maybe thought I’m a captcha decoder. I just had coffee for breakfast and took my lunch at one in the afternoon. We have a chapter quiz on the last period of class and I’m sort of stressed.  Then,there was that activity in the auditorium for the election of officers, bad: haven’t eaten yet and I’m starving already,good: classes were moved to Saturday,that means were free after the election activity.

Yay!We decided to eat dinner at a local grill.

Twas a free flowing conversation and time flew past. It’s good to know more about your new found friends. Truly there are no strangers,just friends we haven’t met yet. We talked,ate and laughed. Tonight is a night full of learning and it’s been a long time since I laughed so much that my jaw ached and I felt like I’m growing some abs. I am thankful and grateful for such company and conversation. Since I don’t usually have the chance to sit down with friends, I say, what happened was a rare and special thing.

We ended with a milk shake treat and another set of conversation…so it didn’t ended yet. Nyaha!

Is it possible that you are intolerant only with fresh milk? How does really fresh milk tastes like? Would you answer a call from an unknown number? Does Ma’am Econ really look like Mr. Bean? What is the proper way of laughing?

My thought for tonight: Communication is a key ingredient to understanding thus will lead to the much dreamed of peace.

July 11,2013

A friend of mine posted  a status in facebook asking what wedding gift would be right for the wedding of someone you once loved. I almost wrote on the comment section “what gift would you give for the wedding of a person you’ve  always loved?”  I’m pretty sure we are talking of the same person. She must’ve been happy for him and I’m here sulking over the thought that he’s near to being a husband and I’m still zipped mouth on my feelings.  The more he talks about the girl, the more I knew about her; and the more I knew about her, the more that I seem to like her. Seriously, I cannot doubt his preference with the girl (he told me, she’s not that kind of a beauty but he chose her because he saw in her  what she saw in me)----ya’ll out there ,can you tell me what’s that supposed to mean? Does he meant, he would’ve wanted me in the first place? Or he just meant, I’m his standard for benchmarking?

 I was invited of course to the wedding, and personally I’d really like to attend such big special day for him. Unfortunately, I have activities outside work and I’m still not sure whether I can compromise which for which. The big day is part of the examination days at school. Jokingly, I’d just say I can’t attend because I’m afraid I’d might ‘speak now’ like Taylor Swift’s song. With more humor in mind, maybe I can just say I’d attend the wedding if and only if someone can assure that the wedding won’t push through. I know the last one’s sort of not so good. It is never good to think of barricading someone else’s happiness especially if that person is so special to you. You would always want to see them happy and nurse your own bruises in the comforts of your room.

Setting my emotions aside , let’s go back to the perfect wedding gift. I have many ideas for wedding gifts but I wanted this one to be special. Something that will last and make me well remembered and won’t leave my finances broke.  Any ideas for this panic stricken gal? Wedding bells will be ringing on the third Saturday of this month.

July 18,2013

I had caffeine boost for the day from coffee to colas but to no effect I’m still sleepy.Does yawning mean you are sleepy or just bored?

July 24,2013

Got missed calls from an unknown number at early morn. Turned out it’s him saying thank you for the gift and expressing his feelings of “mahay” on me for not coming to his wedding. ‘Tis good to hear the same familiar comforting voice…I guess he will always be that someone who wasn’t mine but will always be there when needed. Unlike some people,who expressed and assured to be always there and they end up the one  leaving. (tsk!)

Things are way better when promises aren’t made….and when assuming is out of the scene.

My performance at work and in school is pivoting down and it’s making me dizzy. I am always distracted and my mind is always wandering off. I seem to procrastinate more than the normal procrastination acceptable and I know It’s not good. My score on quizzes are below the passing score and sometimes if lucky, I’m just on the passing mark. I need to get a grip of myself and get back to life.! So may God help me.  I wouldn’t want to let people to fully affect the way I live my life, I’ve already been through that and I’d like to do away with it because it ain’t healthy.

replays... (photonotmine)

..an abundance of Katherines and Ice creams.

..healthy treat it is.

I’m not an ice cream freak but my moods  were swirling down that  I need some good ol’ pick-me-upper. Normally a good book does the trick but I needed another booster… this is the part where the ice cream crept in.

FIC (Fruits in Ice Cream) in Cagayan de Oro City is located at 2^nd Floor Ayala Centrio Mall.  The attendant is friendly and patiently attends to your queries regarding the array of choices, explains options thus leading you to come up with a more personal choice. You can opt for an ice cream on a cup or on a cone.

If you’re someone like me who loves savoring moments, this is the place where you get to enjoy your ice cream in contented silence. By silence, I meant free from unnecessary noise. Plus they play Boyce Avenue on air (my fave…yay!)…in a matter of one song, I know I’ve just found a special place that I can keep coming back to.

Didn't had any hard time finishing it.

I ordered a scoop of pistachio and another for raspberry rapture.. 

Color is natural. Flavor taste is natural plus there are actual pistachio nuts in it! Generously, I say! What more can I say? Perhaps just a hmmm and two thumbs up!

You can like their FB page Fruits in Ice cream or visit their site by clicking this link.

P.S. I just bought myself a new book! Abundance of Katherines by John Green…(retail therapy)