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When  Thank You seems not enough, you just gotta say thank you again and sprinkle more ajinomoto.

A mountaineer have conquered Cagayan de Oro City by successfully completing a solo quest in search for  Pane e Dolci's Sylvannas. Thankfully, he found it! and thankfully, he was able to handcarry those oh so precious baby packages back to General Santos City . 

To congratulate him for that and to welcome a potential CDO tourist. I have bought him a shirt. 

Choosing designs from a souvenir shop is easy peazy, what will eat your your time is deciding what size to buy for a person who seems to bloat and shrink. (oooops!) 

December, and I was malling,strolling and shelling money for books (eherm) I got this shirt hand delivered to me.  (sealed and delivered but not signed). No letters, no notes dude. How sad. (haha)

From General Santos City to someone who hasn't been there yet! 

And my goal is to really fatten myself up and fill up the shirt. It can pass as a dress if I haven't tucked the shirt in. (teehee) I realized then, how thin I am. (Please send tuna from GSC the next time please!)

Thank you GSC...and it's no Ajinomoto sprinkles when I say I love GenSAn. I haven't been there (yet), but I have developed a sense of love for GenSan mainly because of the people there. My BBFF, FBF and the yaya monkey faced on the first picture and for the future friends I haven't met yet. 

See you GenSan! (the soonest) crossed fingers!

*this post is already long due. I was caught up already in the hustle and bustle of Christmas season as well as the 2015 back to work mode. Good thing I have this alibi to blog and divert my stressed ranger mode and find something to be thankful for amidst the chaos around and within me. (hahaha)

Mercury Retrogade 2015

I guess I'm up for another Facebook Blocking. Men! Can't blame you if you can't take my rash online behaviour.

Peace yo! and see you around. 

I don't know if I'd blame the things that are happening right now to mercury retrogade. I've been extra moody these days, but I am aware though that I am also extra cautious in making abrupt decisions. I have learned my lesson in mercury retrogade in the year 2013.  As much as possible, I don't want to make the same mistake again. 

So, all decisions will be moved to February 12,2015...though I cannot bear to lose this single chance of magic that is about to expire (maybe) 12,000 seconds from now.

okufanele ngikwenze?

I am not Numb, just Dumb sometimes

I am supposed to get a haircut today. I usually have my haircuts on 17th or 27th of the month. It just became sort of a ritual for me. To shed something in commemorating either a special day or one of the few worst days I had.

Way back year 2013, on this same date, my life changed because of a message that said I'm beautiful, I have the look and I am a good person. It's just that we don't look good together because I look like a kid when we're together. Warning me not to expect too much and setting a boundary to "just friends" with extended hopes that i'd understand.

He was so honest and I admired the guts he had. (making me like the person more)

I value truth so much that I believe that Honesty will always remain as the best policy. But sometimes I wish I could have those moments where I can enjoy the bliss of ignorance.

Since then, I've tried to wear dresses and strived to look better in the eyes of those around me. My confidence had never been shaken until that day. I felt insecurity for the first time. I was always the "I-don't-care-what-other-people-think-as-as-long-as-my-conscience-is-clear" kind of person ."simplicity is beauty" has always been my mantra and motto. I preferred jeans,shirts,flat sandals,hooded jackets and sling bags. Now, my clothes scaled up to dresses,blouses,cardigans,blazers,skirts and shoes... I can't let go of the sling bags though which left the the classier bags to remain unused. 

He made me feel bad that day, but he did inspired me to become better. Always throwing side comments on taking care of one's self first before the others. He lets me see things without offending me. Bluntly honest about my figure(stick figure), my blindness (i wear eyeglasses) and my hair (unruly untreated hair). He taught me to trust. Now, you won't blame me if I wouldn't want to let go of such a great find. 

And I won't blame him either, if he wanted me to let go of him (or the other way round)

I had taken his presence for granted.

He was sweet. I am not.

He was carefree. I am stiff.

He was happy. I am bitter.

He's mature. I am childish.

People say I was numb.

I think our realizations aren't in sync:

he realized I'm sort of special: I didn't saw anything special

he realized I wasn't that special at all: I realized he's sort of special

no further realization on his part (assumed by me): I realized that he is so damn special.

no further realization on his part (assumed by me): I realized that he's not really special,because he's way more than that, and I wished I fought for that.

...does that make me dumb?

 I wasn't really prepared for a relationship that time. I was finding my way blindly on a dark room . Neither am I prepared right now. I am so full of different truths that they blind me with great light.

I am still hopeful though. Still trying to fatten myself up.

still, I am saddened by that fact that no one seems to take me seriously just because I look way much younger than my actual age. I am constantly torn between improving myself vs. being myself.

So, today... I am not getting that sentimental haircut yet. I will grow my hair and hopefully will go for a curly-do. 

They say i look neat with the short bob, but now, I think I just have to deal with the fly-away hair and see if I look better with curls. (haha) yada.yada. to what other people might say. If you know my worth, I believe my appearance won't get in the way.

December Gifts

Last Saturday I went to run an errand. And that errand is to pick up gifts for me from a party I wasn't able to attend last December. My peg was "no show" for 2 parties and a wedding. I didn't really wished not to come, it's just that there are many kinds of threats when in comes to safety in traveling. 

Biane. Gomennasai.

...and arigatou for these gifts. 

Since I am away from home. A mug is my all-in-one drinking glass (for coffee,juice,tea,water and even for soup), unlike at home where you get to have a cup, a mug and a glass.

These are hand cremes by Glam Works. I love that they come in small tubes that you can put in the pocket of your bags. They are sweet yet fresh smelling too. I know they're hand cremes but I am going beyond than just my hands. I am currently using the pink one as body lotion and reserving the green ones just for my hands.

....and the letters! I love letters. 

I saved this picture for last because it seems to have a theme aside from the color pink. A watch,a dainty stationery,and Victoria's Secret Love Spell in a bottle. The letter told me of hopes that I'd like the scent. Like is underrated. I love the scent, and in  fact I've been trying to search for that sweet fruity scent for many years now. I've encountered the scent in Comfort room stalls in  malls and I'm just too shy to ask the person what scent is she using. (haha). Now, it finally found its way into me.

The watch's band needs adjustment since I have a thin wrist. As written in the letter, I can have the strap adjusted at any watch repair shop.*wink

Now, as for the theme I mentioned. . . You see a perfume and a watch. I see the need for a love spell and I hear the time ticking as the days bring me to my 27th birthday next month. (harhar). 

People are telling me that it's high time I marry. Marry!? To whom? 

Tick.Tock.Tick.Tock.

A fire that kindles other fires

It's 2015 and the string of vacation days have reached the end knot. 

We are back to work and saving, and I now have a string of reports to make which entails many minor strings of mini tasks before I can start accomplishing the end goal report. Man, I am already exhausted in the first week. But being able to have reflection days during holidays lengthened my patience and rekindled my passion for good and purposeful things.

For me, taking a break means reading. And whilst I took that break, I happened to browse the pages of school publication and I'm putting in here what struck me during that few seconds of breaktime. 

" Look at the problem and find a way to solve it. Do not waste your time looking for someone to blame. Just solve it. As Shell puts it, "Say No to NO". "Isn't it time to be negative about negativity?" or as Nike puts it "Just Do It."-----FR.BIENVENIDO F. NEBRES,SJ

So I would just do that. What is important is to get things done. A choice needs to be made and it matters on priority. I choose to give my best and ask for help. There's no time to dilly dally and sulk over things that should've been done but weren't.

Gambatte as we strive to have a better world this 2015! May we never lose the passion that fires us up to give more and love more with our high hopes that we'll set others on fire to do the same.

Keep the fire burning!