Wednesday, December 24, 2014

What was mine will go. What was given to me will stay.

I went home to the mountains for the holidays and made some time to do a little clean-up drive in the house. My ma presented to me a box full of papers that I needed to sort out (according to her) so that we can dispose some of the clutters in the house.

The box contained my exam papers in kindergarten and elementary days as well as quiz papers and assignments from my highschool days. There were attendance sheets,cards,letters and artworks. I have to admit that I had second thoughts on throwing those things away specially that I consider them as remembrance as well as documentation on my performances at school when I was younger. I have to say, I did well. and I wonder why can't I do the same in this present times? teehee.

But some things have to go, and that does not mean the memory will go as well. The good old days will remain while the clutter must go. So I said goodbye to my high scores and very good remarks and managed to keep some of the artworks given to me? or demanded by me? from my friends in elementary.

To my friends:If ever you see these, I wonder if you could still recognize your works and can still remember our huge fascination on Anime TV Show Slam Dunk. :)










Credits to my friends

Friday, November 28, 2014

What will be will be

Blocking. This is one feature of Facebook that is a thousand harsher than the unfriend button.  Why do people block someone on FB? There can be many reasons why a person would decide to block someone from simple reasons that a person is annoying to worst cases like harassment.

It all narrows down to two main reasons: You don’t want “A” to see you and your public activities on Facebook and the second is that you don’t want to see “A” on any part of facebookdome.

How would you know you are blocked? If you’d use another Facebook Account and you can still view A’s profile, then good gracious, you are obviously blocked by that person (like me), Strictly banned from viewing A’s profile, adding that person as a friend as well as sending messages to the person(like me). To add more, you won’t be able to see if “A” liked or commented on a photo, post or link.


I haven’t blocked anyone on Facebook just until now. I have clicked the unfriend button more than a dozen times and I’ve   (consciously) been unfriended too a couple of times, but I havent’ been blocked by a person just until recently.

As far as my honest assessment, I have been good in Facebook and never rude. I am not annoying but at times  I do playful ploy-ing. And so I cannot really understand (i just don't get it) why was I blocked?

Being blocked hurts. It hurts your ego and your soul. It is like you are wished to never exist. It is like you are not wanted in somebody else’s life that even the public information and posts are denied from you.

Unfriend means: do not meddle in my life, I just know you now by face and you’re not important. Watch me from both near and far. Just a face with a half-forgotten name.

Blocked means: I do not want you to become part of my life and vice versa (I do not want to become part of your life).

But in the end of your monthlong frustrated wondering of the why’s and the feelings of being hurt and etc., you’d realize that maybe,just maybe, the intention of blocking you might be to help the BOTH of you to become happier and not the other way round.

Could it be that you are blocked, so that you will stop viewing his/her profile or that maybe, to stop him/her from viewing your profile. There are many sides to one story, but on my side (right now), I am thankful that he slammed shut the door at my face, that way I can tend  my bruises on the doorstep and strut away. When I walk away, you won’t catch up on me limping.

Yes, I was so damn hurt. That’s how I badly wanted to become a part of somebody’s life and oh how I wished that somebody to become part of mine. But there are just certain things that cannot be…and sometimes life needs to put not just signs but also  drop bombs on the boundaries to really let us know that IT CANNOT BE.


I just simply have to let it be.


K.BYE

Thursday, November 27, 2014

PICPA Funrun and other Foot Works


PICPA held its first fun run last November 23,2014. It was my first complete funrun. I have registered for previous funruns for the school and for the 2014 MILO marathon,but sadly, I wasn't able to get up early. So,So...PICPA funrun is a first! and I loved it!

 Yes. that was me! Do not laugh at my 3K feat (hahaha) ,my last jogging activity was seven months ago.  As a beginner, I am proud of myself for waking up early and honestly having fun at the funrun. Of course, I ran...walked,jogged but mostly I did a lot of brisk walking. (teehee)

credits to PICPA for this photo

I'm with friends-cum-classmates.



And I am so happy for the lootbag like a kid giddy of receiving candy loots on a party. (I warned you...It's funrun first timer ignoramus).

 Inside the lootbag: certificate,fliers about PICPA, a keychain with a flashlight (courtesy of Cherry Mobile), a promo/discount certificate from SongHitz KTV bar giving us 1 hour free for every hour paid (I love dancing there than singing), Tourist Spot Fliers, biscuits,wafers and candies. (though, I was a bit sad knowing, my friend's lootbag contained chocolates while mine didn't)

 
Inside the lootbag: certificate,fliers about PICPA, a keychain with a flashlight (courtesy of Cherry Mobile), a promo/discount certificate from SongHitz KTV bar giving us 1 hour free for every hour paid (I love dancing there than singing), Tourist Spot Fliers, biscuits,wafers and candies. (though, I was a bit sad knowing, my friend's lootbag contained chocolates while mine didn't)


excuse my hair, I haven't combed my hair since before the funrun :) me: on the left

We then had our breakfast at Roy's Bistro 

and...it doesn't end there... After going home,taking a shower and a change of outfit, we went for Sergio's much deserved Pedicure, walked around the city in search of an open massage spa (found one, but will open 1pm in the afternoon), we walked further towards school for our lunch (cars were everywhere and everyone's into Pacman's fight). After lunch, we went to the mall and bought tickets for the Mockingjay and went back to the massage parlor for our relaxing foot massage. 

After one hour of relaxation, we dashed off back to the mall for the movie (we were like 15 minutes late already) and roamed around the mall for a last minute gift shopping before heading for a birthday dinner.

It was a long and well spent day. My realization? Start the day early and grab each second. 

P.S.  I thought I will be forever collecting Jerseys and never running for it, but there's always a first for everything. 




Good thing I didn't gave up on the thought.

Friday, November 21, 2014

RED package: delivered:received:happy

Tadah! Here are the contents of the red envelope sent to me by my BBFF all the way from General Santos City. Thanks to her Officemate who went to Camiguin Island, we got a courier with no fees. (oops!peace!)


 She sent me the photocopies to Shariah's Law on Inheritance. Yes, she's into law and all hail to her super time management skills that she goes to work at day and goes to school at night and can still maintain being a daughter,sister,friend and girlfriend at all times throughout the days (and may I insert) and still had some time to read this shariah Law on inheritance . I tried reading a part of it and It's confusing when you don't have 100% focus into it. 



Each of us have woes on our studies. We don't have actually the same experiences but (surprisingly) we do have the same sentiments. (life.life.life).


I also finally got the loombands she made for me (in shades of purple,as per my request). She made these during the loomband craze months ago to make her bored times still productive. And, shall I say, they're the right size for my wrist!


Included in the folder is a thoughts to keep by hallmark which we use as bookmarks and at the same time a note card. Sadly, I cannot find any of these nowadays in National Bookstores, They always tell me, that Thoughts to Keep by Hallmark are not available anymore (how is that?). 

That long note on the left part is actually a letter. I/we love writing letters as much as receiving them.*winks


At first glance, I thought she sent me some beads for me to make a bracelet or maybe some pebbles for me to keep as a remembrance. But the note said that these are yummy! So they're edible! Do not underestimate these pebble-looking thingy, they did taste yummy in different shades/taste of chocolates. Though I can say these are PG13 treats. I do not recommend giving these to toddlers or younger kids, lest they'll pick pebbles along the yard and mistook them as candies. (We don't want that to happen) Hehehe.


and....I miss her. I miss our long walks and talks. I am looking forward for the next time we'll hangout together. I am not making plans. Life has a way to sabotage my plans especially when I get excited...so I'll just keep calm and quiet.

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Chooseday: Tuesdays--Charles Chaplin




“As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is “AUTHENTICITY”.
As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody if I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it “RESPECT”.
As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it “MATURITY”.
As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment. So I could be calm. Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE”.
As I began to love myself I quit stealing my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it “SIMPLICITY”.
As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF”.
As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is “MODESTY”.
As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worrying about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where everything is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT”.
As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART”.
We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born. Today I know “THAT IS LIFE”!”
— Charles Chaplin

Charles Chaplin is more known as Charlie Chaplin, an English actor, Comedian and Film maker
























*credits to the owner















Saturday, September 27, 2014

Rurouni Kenshin-The Legend Ends

So it's September 27 again. 2 years ago, this day marked a "First in my Lifetime" event. Last year, I wept for it. Today, I'm celebrating it!

I'm celebrating the lessons I've learned throughout my 'moving-on' process. I've finally decided to let go of the things and people that doesn't make me happy.

Activities for the day:
Changed my Profile Picture in Facebook.
Changed my Relationship Status to single.
Lots of Status posts all throughout the day
Meet up for our thesis at school
and...watched a movie with friends. 

Rurouni Kenshin-The Legend Ends

I have no idea what the movie's part one is all about but I can say that part two can still stand as a solo movie in its own. Though it would've been nicer and special if I've watched part 1 of the movie beforehand,

The movie's theme revolves around "the will to live"..

In our lives, we tend to say "even if I die" for the sake of something or someone we hold dear, but this is not the ultimate thing of selflessness. We need to stay alive to enjoy it. We need to stay alive for our loved ones. Take care of yourself before any other. Protect yourself before any other. (you can't find these lines in the movie).

" Think of your own survival before others". 

For if we are able and healthy, we will be able to protect others.
photo  credits to owner


Amidst the sword fights,fist fights, large fries and coke float , these thoughts have changed my OA point of views in life to a more hopeful one:

This life is not ours to throw or waste away. Stay Alive and live it beautifully.

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Love.Misadventure.Love.Repeat cycle.

I am rereading Lang Leav's Book  (Love  and Misadventure) and I couldn't believe myself that I bought this book at Php 575.00.

Love and Misadventure by Lang Leave
The book having few lines for each poem and a blank after every poem  seemed to me (now) as an expensive unreasonable splurge. In fact, I think I just bought a notebook (I can  fill the blank pages with my own thoughts or notes).

But I couldn't blame my self for long and you couldn't blame me either,her poems are like small cannon balls the size that of a marble and explodes bigtime. Sometimes, the words don't blast in my face but become like that of creepy crawlers,giving you goosebumps (not the horror kind) and sometimes like pest eating my heart up little by little. (munch by munch?). So few in words, but bursting. So few in words but ..(insert hand animations here!!!!!)


If you haven't read the book,you should. And if you don't have time yet, then you should add it on your reading list.

If you aren't so into poems, well, do not judge all poems just because they are named poems. Poems are not there to tell you how to feel...they are here to tell us that we feel. 


inspired by the great Lang Leav
Good thing, the termites wasn't able to find their way to this book. I'm planning to lend it to anyone who wants to read it. I'm even planning to force my friends to read it (nyahe!)

It would be a shame for a good book to be kept shelved forever...A good book should be shared.
So.so. Who wants to borrow?

I am adding her new book "Lullabies" in my wish list together with a wish that I'd get the copy for free *winks *winks :D

Saturday, August 2, 2014

I wished for Augustus and I was given Augustermites

Pagpasok ng Buwan ng Agosto, nakasaad sa aking horrorscope na kelangan ko maglinis at magtapon. Sa sobrang dami ng piscean sa mundo, hindi ko aakalaing ako ang pinapatamaan ng pagpapaalala na iyon.

Tinanog ako ni BFF kung alam ko ba yung Cupidity na libro. Sabi ko "OO,meron nga akong kopya ng libro na iyan". Manghihiram daw siya, kaya naman, pag dating na pagdating ko sa bahay, agad kong kinuha ang libro sa cabinet upang maihanda ko nang maipadala sa kanya sa susunod na weekend.

 Sa kasamaang palad, may bakas ng anay ang librong cupidity. Kinabahan na ako...sabi ko sa sarili ko NOOOOOOOO....wag naman ang mga books ko. Nung nakaraang buwan, inanay ang mga sapatos ko, dahilan upang itapon ko sila. (ang iba dun ay di pa nagagamit masyado). Ang tanging natira nalang sa aking ay yung napagtyagaan pang linisin. Bumalik tayo ulit sa libro,so ayu na , kinuha ko yung kasunod na libro at talagang nanlumo nako at mangiyak ngiyak. Nevermind na sakin yung mga anay na gumagapang sa kamay ko. Ang tanging nasa isip ko ay, bakit eto pang mamahalin na libro ang talagang nginatngat nila. Hardbound.Isang beses palang binasa. walang mintis at papasa bilang brand new book. 

Maraming libro ang nadale, pati journals ko (a.k.a hilaw na diary) hindi pinatawad. Mga literary write-ups ko (char!) na nakasulat sa scratch papers at resibo nagmukhang islands sa mapa. 

Ganun kasaklap ang bumungad sa akin. Imbes na matutulog ako ng maaga o di kaya ay mag-aaral para sa pasulit ngayong araw, naglinis ako ng cabinet at nagtapon ng mga mahahalagang bagay para sa akin. At dahil dyan, hindi ako nakatulog!

Nang ngingit ngit ako sa mga anay na yun, kulang nalang ay silaban ko sila. Pero syempre, hanggang sa akin nalang ang mga bad words ko. Ang tanging narinig nila (kung sila man ay may pandinig) ay ang mga panghihinayang at kalungkutan ko at ang mangiyak ngiyak kong boses. Sana naman (kung sila man ay damdamin) ay hindi na masundan. Tama na ang sapatos at libro. Hindi ko na babanggitin ang susunod na mga importanteng bagay sa akin at baka yun naman ang tirahin nila. (tsk!)


Tinatayang umabot sa xx,xxx.xx piso ang napinsala dahil sa anay na mga yun. Hindi pa kabilang doon ang mga sapatos.

Mabuti nalang at nasa classmates ko ang  mga John Green Books ko. Pero si stylized at the single woman at iba pang pocketbooks...pwede pang pagtyagaan pero hinarrass na sila ng anay.

Ang tanging pasalamat ko nalang rin ay, wala paring mintis ang Lang Leav na libro. (thank you. thank you.)

so ganun lang naman ang nagyari. naglinis.nainis.napuyat.

at wala akong maipakitang larawan bilang ebidensya kasi sira ang camera ko at ang cellphone ko ay TV at flashlight lang ang napapakinabangang extra features. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

Shinglines Beybeh!

It originally started with the page high-lighted lines. When I was on my heartbreak mode last February 2013. My plan was to post lines from songs and give credit to the original artists behind it. It would be a good time to know more of song titles too. It was named highlighted lines because in every song, whether we love the song or not, there will always be a line that will trigger our nerves. If we just take time to read the lyrics to Eminem or Slapshock songs, you’d be shocked to know that there will be a line or two that’ll make sense to you.

Aside from original lines, I also thought of maybe I can alter some lines to fit a certain situation or emotion. Like changing the words “she” to “he” and etc. But, It all remained as a plan. I was too busy moping and reflecting upon the songs I’m hearing that I became too lazy to kickstart my plan. And so the page remained as created with no posts except for the ‘about section’ and the ‘page profile pic’.

Days dragged by, and pimples started to pop on my face. I was having sleepless night and sometimes the no-sleep nights. The lack of sleep was due to constant facebooking and the things I found out kept me thinking all night.  So , I disabled certain people’s posts from showing on my newsfeed . I continued on my facebooking, refreshing every hour for new posts. In addition to facebook, I also chill out in youtube with Realitychangers, Ana Akana and many other vloggers. My days we’re just like that. I go to work and go home, my in betweens are composed of washing clothes,eating (which takes a small portion of the time pie) and of online surfing  and moping(which took much of my time).

I continued with my soundtrips and reflections on song lines,vlogs and picture quotes. When Oh’s birthday was fast approaching, my frustration ballooned again and I cannot flood my Facebook profile with picture quotes and OA lines lest people will laugh at me. So I decided to use the Facebook page as an outlet for creative creations. Since I was more determined that time, I tried to strategize (char!) on how can I get the people to like the posts. I realized that high-lighted lines is too lengthy to type on the search bar and too hard to remember. I didn’t know how to change the page name, so I just created another page and named it Shinglines. .I named it shinglines because I will still stick to song lyrics. Shinglines because Shing! (you read it fast and with stardust)…Shing is like kaching! Like POOf! Or it can pass as 100th cousin to the expression eureka! Shinglines because the page is to bring you lines from songs that made me stopped, think and say hey! OMJ just the right kill for my current emotion.

So you do realize, how hard it is for me to explain “why shinglines?’ in words. I’d rather answer it with hand flips and eye animations because it’ll be easier that way. (ahaha).

As time went by…I’ve been reflecting so much on words and I also thought that “ why shinglines?’ can also be answered by : It is shinglines, because people who are lovedrunk are greatly affected by songs. When you’re lovedrunk (either tipsy or wasted), the songs you hear were like exclusively written for you. They sing out loud, talk sluggishly and walk in straight zigzag lines. That is why the page was named shinglines. (hmmmm)

Days later, I realized that what I was doing was tiresome.  I jot down line from songs I heard, googled the title and artist, and proceed to picture editing. This is part of my strategizing, I opted for lyrics on picture form than plain typed text. I realized that if I were a page liker, my attention will be caught more by pictures rather than just text.

These are some of the pioneering creations (so newbie)
























 I gave up on picture editing… Editing apps need fast internet connection and I don’t have much patience to wait for the picture to load, to choose among the many font types and layers as well as resizing the image size. So I gave up on the song lyrics and the page became a sort-of storage for the pictures quotes I saved years ago. Must I tell you that I have a huge collection of picture quotes that they are eating lots of storage spaces(?). And what then, If I’m just keeping these great finds to myself, what then? So that’s how shinglines came up to be a collection of inspirations,frustrations and in betweens with it’s long description worded as :collection of about anything that stumbled upon my way...and sharing these treasures to the page likers. Life is too short to find things out by ourselves...let us live from other people's lessons . (not  enough to call it long).

Shinglines was created February 28,2013.I posted regularly but didn’t launch the page until few months after. I was still having that fear of what people will say.  I invited Facebook Friends to like the page and told them to invite their friends too. I might’ve become annoying on their notifications asking them to like the page. But I went on with the invites sometimes even pleading (nyahehehe).

As usual, some said “wow” and of course there will always be that someone to say “you’re weird” , “maintaining a page?” “what for” “why so?”.

It may seem weird, but you see?!,weird is the new awesome! (hekhek).

What for? And Why so? ……Shinglines became my outlet and it pushed me to become more positive in life. Because no one would want to click the thumbs up for a page that is reeking with negativity. 
The page stats are poor. The likes, the shares and visits are poor but I do hope that someone is getting something from the page posts.


I’d love it if you visit the page and click like. ;D